Went shopping

We had waited to know what we were having before buying anything. All we had was a green bib and towel set that said "I love my mommy" and "I love my daddy". So the day after finding out Ian was a he, I had to go to Babies R Us. HAD to. I was alone because Hazen had to work. As I'm driving through the parking lot (very, very slowly I might add) this huge Suburban comes backing straight into me! She stopped just in time, but I was so angry. I was in a parking lot FILLED with kids (it was a Saturday, and there were tons of families and strollers and toddlers everywhere) and this woman comes backing out without looking? And she would have wiped out my Accord. She was MUCH bigger than me. So right there, I turned into a blubbering mess. I was so upset because she had almost hit my rear passengers side--which is where my baby's carseat would have been had he been born yet! She could have wiped out my baby! Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little, but I'm pregnant, I'm hormonal, and my stomach flu had been a real person for less than 24 hours. I was not pleased. So I parked and called Hazen crying that that evil woman had tried to kill my baby. I wipe my face, and walk into the store. Suddenly, the baby store I had loved and easily walked through so many times before became a scary dungeon. When I didn't know he was a boy, for whatever reason, he just didn't seem so real to me. Now, I had a baby boy that needs soooo much and I had no idea where to start. I was there mostly just to get something blue--I wanted something very "boy". I wandered through the outfits, and I just couldn't find anything that was "right" for my baby. I wandered through aisle after aisle of baby supplies. Suddenly, I had to get out of there. I couldn't do this! I left the store crying and empty handed. Again, I called Hazen crying. I told him I was a horrible mom because first I had almost let that woman hit me and then I couldn't even find him something to wear? What was I going to do? Have a naked baby? I was so upset. I'm starting to think pregnant women shouldn't be allowed out of the house on their own. And I haven't even gotten into the affect country music has on my when I'm driving--I've had to enforce a self imposed ban on country music if I'm alone in the car.

Ultrasound

This is the appointment I made that I had to pay for. Didn't care though--I had to know if I was growing an "Ian" or a "Hanna". We invited my mom, and Joe and Vida (Hazen' brother and his wife who happens to be one of my bestest friends ;) ). The entire night before, I could not sleep. I kept dreaming about the ultrasound. The horrible thing was that they kept telling me it was a girl, and in my dreams I would get pissed everytime they would say that. Apparently, for the first time in my pregnancy, I was convinced I was having a boy. Vida kept asking me what I thought it was, and I kept having to tell her I didn't know. All of a sudden, that day, I was sure. It was a boy. I didn't want to say anything in case I was wrong though, and I felt so guilty for being so angry and disappointed if it was going to be a girl. I just knew in my dreams they were wrong, and they were calling my baby boy a girl! We had to wait for a little while in the waiting room, but it was okay. We looked at shower invite samples and stuff (Vida is throwing my shower) so we stayed occupied. When we were called in, we all filed into the room. It was actually pretty cool. They had couches and a big screen T.V. They better considering how much money I was paying to have it done. ;) She asked us if we knew what we were having and we said no. It made her so excited that she was going to be the one to tell us. :) Right away, she said "Well, it looks like..." and then she cut off and said "No, I won't say anything until I'm certain". At that point, I knew it was a boy. Girls are harder to tell, so I just knew there had to be something there that she was seeing. Hazen told me he was convinced at that point that it was a girl. :) She wiggled the wand a little bit and got the baby to bounce up. Suddenly we were looking at a baby butt and a very obvious baby penis. There was no doubt he was all boy. She said "Look at that! It's a boy!!" I turned to Hazen and made some kind of strange sound (I think I said "Oh!" or something) and could feel the tears in my eyes. It was so incredible to know. Suddenly, the baby became a real person with a gender and a name. It was awesome. Hazen just kept rubbing my shoulder. I knew he had been hoping for a boy, and I was wishing it wasn't so dark and that it was just the two of us because I wanted so badly to see his reaction. He told me later he was rubbing my shoulder so hard because he was trying not to cry. I'm going to have a blubbering mess on my hands come delivery day. :) The rest of the ultrasound was really cool, but just not as exciting as that moment. For the longest time, Ian wouldn't do anything BUT show us "the goods". We couldn't get a profile out of him or anything. He just kept pushing his butt up in our faces. I have a little exhibitionist in there. :) We had decided to NOT get a 3d ultrasound because they freak out Hazen, but the tech was really nice and went into 3d for us a couple of times anyway. She warned us before that he might look a little weird because at 20 weeks, they're still pretty thin. She was really impressed with how good and filled out our little guy was though. He's my chunky monkey--he wasn't thin at all. :) It was so amazing to see how real he looked, but you could tell he wasn't completely developed yet. Ears were a little off and his nose seemed pretty high. But even with that, he looked so adorable, and I really think he looks like Hazen. He totally had his daddy's chin. Hazen thinks I'm nuts and that he looked like "an alien". I guess he still had the face only a mother could love. :) It was really fantastic, and I was so happy to be able to share it with my mom and Joe and Vida. I got some flowers and an "It's a Boy!" balloon afterwards and the blonde in me said "How did you know it would be a boy?". I had a real duh moment when Vida opened the back of her car and said "I didn't!" and the pink balloon popped out. I'm just going with the adreneline messed with my brain. yeah...

Ultrasound!

We had our ultrasound yesterday. It was sooo much fun to see the baby! I wasn't very excited about this one because they wouldn't tell the gender (we get to find that out Friday--yay!) but when I saw how real the baby looked, it was just awesome. And Hazen was soooo cute during it. He was squinting and concentrating so hard (this, of course was because I asked him to look for a turtle--boy, or hamburger--girl. Didn't find anything).
At one point, the tech said something about "HIS" arm, and the rest of the time called the baby an it, but I'm trying hard not to look into it. Hazen said it didn't, but I think it got him excited thinking that it's a boy. he keeps calling the baby a him now. I think getting to see what's actually going on in there made the whole thing more real for us both. :)
I started to feel the baby a couple of weeks ago. Just a couple of rolls in parts of my stomach, but nothing that convinced me entirely it was the baby doing it (could have been gas--one of the MANY MANY joys of being pregnant), but yesterday morning, before the ultrasound, I felt it again. So I put my hand on my belly just for fun to see if I could feel anything and the little bugger KICKED me--TWICE! It was soooo cool. I'm mostly excited about it because now it's going to be any day before Hazen can feel too.
Oh, and this is so his kid. I drank some pop before going in to get the kid dancing a little (you know, increase the chances of seeing a turtle or hamburger) and I guess it was bouncing all over the place while the doctor was getting all her organ shots. But as soon as she turned the monitor to us, baby decided to take a nap. What a brat. She kind of woke it up for a second, but all that accomplished was us getting an angry arm in front of the face shot. She even tried to look between the legs for us but the booger had it's legs crossed. Oh, and if you can't tell from the picture, it's kind of a chunker--weighing about 3 oz higher than normal. (I know, not a lot, but when you're only 10oz to begin with, that's a big difference!)
Anyway, we're happy and I'm getting more and more excited to meet it everyday. Oh, and of course I'll update boy or girl on Friday--yay! :)

Ultrasound

First, they made me drink 32 oz of water in 45 minutes and then I had to be done with that 45 minutes before my appointment. Let me just say, that is CRUEL to make a pregnant already peeing every two second woman hold 32 oz of water for over an hour. I thought I was going to pee myself before I even got to the hospital. I even wore a pad just in case. :) Hazen was at work, so he had to meet up with me, so I was stuck being miserable and having to pee by myself. I didn't mind though, as long as he got there in time. :) When I got in, the first thing I said was "How long until I can use the bathroom??" and the tech was so nice and said "I just need to measure your cervix, and you can go". Once she put the warm wand on my tummy, I about died. I was so near going, it was horrible. I was so sure I was going to pee all over the table. She looked and said "Wow, you are really full! You must have a small bladder! Go!" All I said was "Thank you!" and ran for the restroom. I tell you, that was the most relief I have ever felt in my life. Amazing. :) I got back on the table and she said "For future purposes, you have a small bladder--you don't have to drink so much". The funniest thing is my bladder was full AGAIN before the end of the appointment. She had the screen away from me for a long time, but she kept making comments about how good the heart looked and everything, and that there was a good heartbeat. Such a relief to know the little one was still alive. :) She finished with her stuff, and went to get Hazen from the waiting room (he wasn't allowed in the room with me for the first part, I don't know why). He came in and stood next to me, and we got to watch our baby on the screen. I had drunk some orange juice beforehand to see if I could get it moving. Apparently, the baby was jumping all over when only the tech could see the screen, but as soon as the screen turned to us, baby went to sleep. I guess I wore it out with the sugar. Oops. The policy on base is that they can't look or tell the gender, but right away, she asked if we wanted to know and if we were going to go off base to find out. Yeah! I couldn't possibly wait. :) She said how disappointed she was that she couldn't tell anymore--that that had been her favorite part of the job. I had a feeling she had "checked" while the screen was away from me, but I couldn't know for sure. She tried to look between the legs for us, but the bugger had the legs crossed! I was so disappointed! She wouldn't have been able to say anything if she had seen something, but it was still really nice of her to try. I spent a lot of time studying ultrasound pictures, and I had told Hazen what to look for as well (I later found out that he had spent the entire appointment looking for a "hamburger" or "turtle" and hadn't really heard anything the tech said). At one point she said "And there's his arm" when the rest of the time she had refered to baby as "it". I don't know if she was trying to give a clue or not, but it drove me nuts. I knew I couldn't look too much into that, but it was hard. I wanted to know so bad! The important thing, though, was that the baby was healthy. Such a relief. :)

Felt movement

I think the baby moved today. It was my last day of work and I was standing up when I suddenly felt this...I don't know...flop, I guess, in my tummy. It felt like the baby had just done a couple of somersaults or something. For the first time, I'm CERTAIN it wasn't gas.